


Her-ass-ment

by Iam_aCircle_0



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-21
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-07-15 01:56:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16053047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iam_aCircle_0/pseuds/Iam_aCircle_0
Summary: ‘Odds on’ is a game, like truth or dare, where someone says something like “odds on you doing a back flip,” the other person then has to say a number. That number is the range in which numbers can be said. Then on the count of three, the two players say a number. If that number is the same, the person who was dared to do something must now do it.





	1. Odds on

“Marinette dear, I forgot to grab carrots in the produce aisle, can you go back?” Sabine asked her kind daughter who eagerly went back to aisle one. 

Marinette had woken up late that Sunday morning in a good mood. Assignments were all done and akuma attacks were a rare occasion for the past few weeks. She agreed to help her mum with the grocery shopping out of pure kindness. With all the assignments and exams in the past few weeks, Marinette hadn't really spent time with her mum. It was nice to finally be doing something kind for someone that didn't involve saving their life and having to fight off an akuma. 

Marinette scanned the rows of fruits and vegetables as she stood at the beginning of the open space. And fate behold, she found her eyes laying on a familiar class mate, him to with his mum. Her cheeks flushed red, as would anyone's if they saw their class mate out of school. But to add to her trouble and embarrassment, Kim was standing right next to the carrots. 

———

Kim had just finished a track meet with his track squad across the city. As a ‘payment’ to his mum for driving him across town, Kim was stuck helping her with that night's dinner. He wasn't very enthusiastic about it. 

“Did you get the carrots?” Sabine came up from behind Marinette with their shopping trolley full of the family's needed groceries. 

“Oh uh, no, but I don't think we really need carrots anyway, let's just get some frozen packets or something.” Marinette tried to shuffle her mum away from the sight of her old friend - Abby Chiến Lê, Kim’s mum. They would surely talk for hours and Marinette didn't want to be stuck standing awkwardly behind her mum with Kim doing the same thing. 

“B-but I need carrots for your father's birthday cake.” Sabine pushed around her daughter. Marinette's stomach dropped in dread. 

“Now where are the carrots?” Sabine mattered to herself as Kim and his mum edged closer and closer. The urge to run away getting stronger and stronger for Marinette. 

“Oh look dear! It's Abby.” Sabine began to causally walk over to her old friend. 

Abby had also seen her friend and so the two ladies walk to each other, each with an embarrassed teenager clinging behind them. 

“Hey!” The two mums said in unison. Marinette and Kim’s eyes were glued to the ground. 

“Look Marinette, it's Kim!”  
Marinette glanced up with a smile, her face bright red. 

“Oh I remember when they used to play together constantly. We could never leave your house!” Abby began and they both bursted out laughing. 

Marinette and Kim just rocked back and forth on each leg, looking anywhere but each other. 

Twenty minutes past. The two families were still by the carrots. 

Kim whispered something to his mum before his mum shushed him and blurted out.  
“Why don't you and Marinette finish my shopping list?”  
Kim's face dropping in horror.  
Marinette looking up in surprise. 

“Oh that's a lovely idea!” Sabine encouraged. “Go on dear, I'll meet you outside.” 

Marinette tried giving her mum a stare to show her annoyance, but her mum had already picked up the conversation. 

Kim stood frozen, a shopping list in hand. He lowered his head and began walking off. Marinette's legs dragged her off slowly behind him. 

“Ah, do you know where I would get tomato sauce?” Kim turned to Marinette, his voice unusually shy. 

“Oh ah, maybe aisle four?” Marinette looked up. 

The two continued to aisle four, both scanning every inch of the shelves. 

“Oh here it is.” Marinette walked over to where several red bottles stood in rows. 

“That's hot sauce.” Kim deciphered as he caught up. 

“It doesn't look that hot, it's only got three chillies.” Marinette started.  
“I mean it's probably as close to tomato sauce as you can get.” 

“Yeah nah, I'm not having that on my hot dog.” Kim began to walk away. 

“Why? Is it too hot for you?” Marinette purposely challenged him. She had spent the last twenty minutes standing awkwardly, it was about time something interesting happened. 

“No. Mum just wants tomato sauce.” The nervous pause between assured Marinette that she had challenged him. 

“Well if it's too hot for you I can understand, I mean I could only eat this one when I was three.” Marinette took a bottle from the shelf and pretended to gaze at it as she remembered her recent childhood. 

“You could eat that at three?” Kim took it from her in shock.  
“I mean, I had this one every morning for breakfast at two.” Kim tried to change his position, taking a hotter rated chilly sauce from the shelf. 

“Bet you didn't. I don't think you could eat a whole spoon full now.” Marinette teased. 

“Bet I could!” Kim yelled (a little too loud) defensively. 

“Odds on you opening that bottle and drinking a full gulp!” 

“Ten!”

“Three, two, one,”  
“Four!”  
“Five!”

Kim let out a breath of relief.  
Marinette immediately began thinking of other things she could dare him to do. 

———

“Odds on you standing in the freezer for ten seconds.” 

“What do you mean ‘stand in the freezer’ there's no room!”

“You stand on that ledge and I shut the door, you can fit if I can.” 

“Fine, 12.”

——“One, two, three.” ——  
“Seven!”  
“Four!”

“Now you, odds on you doing it.” 

“What?! I can't fit!” 

“You just said you could!”

“6 then.” 

——“One, two, three.” ——  
“Four!!”  
“Four!”

“Haha yes!”  
“What no! I said five!” 

“Aww, are you afraid of getting a bit chilly?” 

“You're playing a dangerous game Marinette.” Kim shook his head before beginning to move packets of frozen fish. Marinette moved the ones on the bottom shelf with a smug grin. 

In the time it took the two to walk up and down every aisle looking for tomato sauce, somehow marking it all they way down to the frozen food, Marinette had licked seven shelf price labels, Kim had then sprinted in and out of three aisles, knocking into several customers and having to apologise. 

Marinette then did a handstand for much longer than Kim thought possible. Kim then having to do the same but failing and so being forced to do the next thing she dared him to, which was flirt with one of the checkout chics until she gave him her number. 

So after that humiliation on Kim's behalf, he had to get her back. And what else would be more enjoyable to watch then Marinette hitting the butt of whoever Kim pointed out for the rest of the day? 

The game continued with small butt slapping interruptions until Kim managed to squeeze himself into one of the freezers. 

“The door’s not going to shut.”

“Fine, just stand there for ten seconds.” Marinette gave a polite smile to an old lady walking past and giving them both a dirty look. 

Marinette could hear Kim's teeth chattering, this lead her to give a small snicker before one of the employees walked around the corner and started to unpack a box near the end of the aisle. 

“Quick! Get out!” Marinette whisper yelled as to not draw any attention. 

Kim saw and quickly fumbled out of the freezing cold shelf and onto the floor.  
The two stumbled out of the isle in a sprint and hid in three aisles up. 

After a few quick breaths and short giggle, the game continued. 

Kim's favourite song began to play on the stores speakers. It gave him an idea. 

“Odds on you dancing to the song.” He said, pointing up to the speakers. 

Marinette looked up and listened, wanting to know what the song was. 

“I can barely walk and you want me to dance?” She questioned. 

Kim shrugged with a small grin. 

“Fine, 21.” 

“Ah, you can't go higher than 20.” Kim folded his arms. 

“What? Since when?” 

“Since I wanted the game to stay interesting, you can't just be like 54 or something otherwise there's no chance you have to do it.”

“Fair enough. 20 then.” 

——“One, two, three.” ——  
“Fifteen!”  
“Four!”  
“Ha! Wait, why do you always chose four?” 

“I don't.” 

“Yeah you do, for the last five.”

“Yeah, but that sixth one I chose two.” 

“Ok then.” Marinette shrugged loosing interest.  
“Odds on you…”

“Excuse me kids, I'm going to have to escort you out of the store.” 

Kim and Marinette turned in horror as a tall, buff looking man stood over them (Marinette yes, Kim not so much). The two went red with embarrassment as the shop security guard escorted them out, his hand taking a firm grip on their shoulders. 

Outside the grocery store, Marinette and Kim sat in shame on a bench. 

“Ahh! I didn't get any of the stuff my mum wanted!” Kim threw his hands up in frustration. 

Marinette suddenly felt bad. This was all her fault. She started the ‘odds on’ war. She was the reason Kim got distracted and got them both kicked out. But what was she supposed to do? They were kicked out of the shop, it wasn't like she could stroll back in and get the groceries. 

“That guy, go.” Kim interrupted her puzzle-solving thoughts. 

Marinette looked up in confusion. It took her exactly two seconds to understand what Kim meant and then in another two seconds, her heart plummeted to the little dusty corner in the very depths of her soul. 

“No, nu uh, no way, I am not hitting his butt.” 

“You gotta.” Kim smirked as he watched Marinette melt into a complete state of horror.  
“I don't gotta do anything!” 

“You do owe me.”

Marinette groaned. “Fine.” She said through gritted her teeth. 

Kim leant back in the bench as Marinette stood up and pretended to act causal as she walked straight towards their other classmate - Adrien Agrest.


	2. Awkward Butt Hits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kim has gone too far. Expecting Marinette to 'hit' not just 'tap' or 'lightly brush in an awkward walk by' Adrien Agrest's ass.

Adrien had had better days. It was long, exhausting Sunday, with photo shoots, fancy meals, and long conversations with businessmen as his father had returned from his two week trip to Italy that morning. 

He was worn out by 3:30 in the afternoon. He still had a regional fashion dinner that night that was expected to go until eleven. It was all he could think about, most of that thought was dread. Just a quick stop at the groceries and then he had two hours to get ready.   
Adrien had asked to stop by the grocer so he could buy a week’s supply of Camembert cheese for Plagg. Of course he didn't tell Nathalie that. 

But if there was one thing that he would never have guessed would happen between the road and the shop door, it was his good friend, Marinette Dupain-Cheng coming up from behind him and slapping him, with her bare hand, right on his left butt cheek. 

If Marinette wasn't already scarlet red, she was as her legs somehow managed to carry her away briskly from the scene of the crime. 

Kim sat hunched over in stitches, trying desperately to keep his eyes open to watch the dare unfold. 

Adrien watched in complete and pure confusion as Marinette walked back steadily to a bursting Kim who looked like the main cause of the whole, thing.

Marinette didn't dare turn around to face him. She stood in front of Kim as a way to encourage Adrien to continue with whatever he was doing and to not pay any attention to them. 

Adrien, after a few seconds of staring for answers, walked into the supermarket to get cheese for Plagg. 

“Oooo a lady lover!” Plagg cooed from inside Adrien's shirt. 

“Keep your voice down, someone will hear you!” Adrien urged in a whisper. 

“What you don't want people to know that your crush from school just hit you on the butt?”

“Plagg, she's not my crush! I like Ladybug.”   
Adrien's voice broke causing Plagg to be suspicious.

“Sure sure, just hurry up and get my cheese so we can go back out there and you can hit her butt!”

“Plagg!”

“What? It's only fair.”

———

Marinette finally sat down on the bench next to Kim. He let out a laugh before she threw her bright red face in her sweaty hands in utter embarrassment. 

“I hit his ass.” She whined just loud enough for Kim to hear. 

“Ah calm down, he probably loved it!” Kim playfully punched his sulking friend in the arm.

Marinette just looked up in annoyance. 

“What? He did, all guys would.” Kim shrugged with a smirk as she reacted in disgust. 

“Look, why don't you just apologise, here he comes.” Kim pointed out.

Adrien's cheeks were still red, but Marinette didn't notice. She just stood straight up and began to ‘casually’ walk away. 

Kim leant back on the bench and watched the show. 

“Hey Marinette!” Adrien called. But Marinette didn't turn around, she just kept walking towards the street. 

“Marinette!” Adrien tried again before chasing after her. 

Marinette set her eyes on the florets shop on the corner of the supermarket’s court yard. She could hide in there and come out after Adrien had left the area. 

But her master plan was interrupted by a tug on her back pocket, causing her to spin in a surprisingly elegant motion. 

Still stunned, Marinette blinked a few times before looking up at the person who had somehow embraced her, his thumb still in the back pocket of her pink pants. 

“So, before was, awkward.” The blond boy grinned with a nervous laugh. 

Marinette just stared at him in shock. Adrien Agrest had just spun her around by her pant pocket! And now her hands were on his chest, his thumb was still in her back pocket, and his other hand was holding out a piece of paper!

“-interesting if you were there.” Marinette managed to catch the last of Adrien's words. 

“S-sorry, what did you s-say?” She stuttered, still a bit distracted by his vibrant green eyes. 

“Oh it's just my phone number,” Marinette took the small teared paper, “there this formal dinner tonight, and I can pick you up around 5:30, that's if you wanted to go, you don't have to, I just thought maybe, maybe you would, but you really don't have to!” Adrien could feel his face adjust to three shades darker red. 

Marinette was quiet. Adrien hated it. He quickly removed his hand from her pocket, forgetting it was there and made distance between them. 

“I-I'd go to loved to, Adrien thanks, I mean thank you Adrien!” Marinette yelled before storming away to who-knows-where, leaving Adrien to smirk with his pink tinted cheeks.


End file.
